June 2nd used to be my favorite day of the year. Since getting divorced, this day brings feelings of sadness and regret. You see, it was on this day that I was first married back in 1984 and remained married for over thirty-one and a half years.
Don't get me wrong, I am happily married to Kelly. She is a beautiful, kind, loving, and supportive wife. She stood by me through the darkest days of my life, and I will forever be grateful to God for restoring me and giving me such a wonderful wife. She is God's blessing to me now, and I thank Him for her.
However, it isn't right to ignore the reality of a marriage that lasted over thirty-one years. It was a union that blessed me with four beautiful children and two lovely grandsons, a marriage that saw me through more than twenty-eight years of ministry, a marriage that was blessed. Because I was happy, the pain of its demise almost destroyed me. Those who know the harsh reality of the pain of loss, be it divorce, death, or whatever, know what I am talking about and will not judge me for the foolish things I did to escape this pain.
He who is without sinโฆ
Everything fell apart during what I see now as The Perfect Storm. And, just like the movie, three colossal forces collided with devastating effects. The first was our children were growing and leaving home. We dedicated our lives to them. They were all homeschooled from kindergarten through high school. As each of them grew and left home, it left a hole in me the size of the Grand Canyon.
The next storm developed when we brought my Aunt down from Vermont and ultimately moved her into the renovated garage attached to our home. While the rest of my family wanted to put her in a nursing home, we decided to take her in. My Aunt begged me to help her, and so we did. I am proud of how my family stepped up and sacrificed so that my Aunt could enjoy the remaining years of her life surrounded by loved ones.
The last storm came as an accusation that we stole from my Aunt. The Probate Court is a corrupt system run by incompetent elected officials who can destroy lives indiscriminately. I could write a book, and perhaps someday I will, about the ordeal we went through. It would have been better to be accused of a crime than be dragged through the Probate system. At least in criminal court, you benefit from being presumed innocent, having an appointed impartial judge, and having a trial by a jury of your peers. Of course, we werenโt accused of a crime because none was committed. Instead, we were dragged through the ridiculous and corrupt buffoonery of a Probate court, a kangaroo court that made a decision against us based on conjecture, prejudice, and hearsay. Worst of all, the judge ignored my Aunt's wishes and denied her rights. My Aunt stood by our side during that terrible time and was deeply grieved by the false accusations of misguided relatives.
I didn't do so well during the Storm. I made foolish decisions to medicate the pain. I take responsibility for my actions and repent for the bad choices I made. He sought me out and found me as He talks about in Luke 15 in the parable of the 100th sheep.
For those of you who know and love me, I want you to know I am doing well and know that my life is right with Him. He is restoring to me the years the locusts have eaten. I have asked and received forgiveness from those I hurt. In His infinite kindness and steadfast love, my ex-wife and I have forgiven one another and remain friends to this day. She even continues to work for me at the YellowJacket Expert and does an excellent job for which I pay her well.
So, instead of grieving this day, I will celebrate the past blessing God gave me and the new ones He is bestowing upon me now. I choose to give thanks for the thirty-one and a successful half years and leave the rest in His loving hands. To God be the Glory.
