Dear 100th Sheep,
How did I get into the mess I was in? I can sum it up in two words: Deception and Disobedience. Which was it? I have to say it was a little bit of both, but one thing is for sure, I was not walking "in the light as He is in the light." (1 John 1:7)
As I look back, I can say that I knew what I was doing was wrong. I didn't have to do any mental gymnastics to justify my sin. I wasn't deceived into thinking that my sin was okay. The Bible says that Eve was deceived. (1 Corinthians 11:13) I was more like Adam. The Bible says that he was with Eve when she conversed with the serpent. (Genesis 3:6) While Eve was deceived, I think Adam saw through the lies of Satan. When Eve handed him the forbidden fruit, I don't think he was fooled for one moment. I think he ate it in direct defiance to the explicit commandment of God.
I think both Adam and I had something more in common. While we knew what we were doing was wrong, neither of us thought that the consequence of our sin would be as bad as it was. Adam saw the entire universe chance for the worse as a result of his disobedience. I think Adam didn’t truly believed that the results would be as severe as God said they would be.
I can relate to him in this. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I didn't believe my life would change as drastically as it did. Sin is never a private thing. While my sin didn't affect the entire universe, others in my world were hurt by the consequences of my disobedience.
As a result, my marriage was destroyed, my family ripped apart, my ministry discredited, the church I pastored closed. I dishonored the name of Christ, ruined my reputation, lost my home, including most of my possessions, and worst of all, I experienced the displeasure of God. For several years, I felt the loving but stern chastisement of my heavenly Father. (Hebrews 12:3-17)
I learned a lot through all the pain. One lesson I learned is the absolute faithfulness of God. I do not wish devastation on anyone, yet, I'd rather be right with God and have nothing than have all things while in disobedience.
I praise Him that my life is right with Him. The good news is that the old temptations that once hooked me have no hold on me any more. God is continually restoring my life and my ministry. My relationships are deeper now and more authentic. And I have no illusions that I am somehow better than anyone else. I love Him with all my heart and have learned the fear of the Lord.
My experience has also given me more patience and understanding with others caught in deception and disobedience. I have close family members who are currently in deep deception. It is so bad we cannot be in fellowship with one another. This separation is not on my part. They are deceived, and yet they participate in the deception by believing Satan's lies. I am sad for them, but I also pray for them every day and ask God to deliver them from the lies and restore them to the truth.
I think we all are in various levels of deception this side of eternity. We do indeed "see through a glass darkly," as it says in 1 Corinthians 13:12. Some are more deceived and disobedient than others. Some choose to live in self-deception and believe the lies of Satan, while others have small deceptions and don’t act on them. Since we all are deceived on one level or another, God has given us His Holy Spirit, the Church, and, most notably, the Bible.
Why would I say that the Bible is perhaps the most important? Because it is the infallible source of the information God has given us to know how to live a godly life here on earth. The self-existing Triune God has communicated all we need to know for faith and practice through this wonderful Book. As 2 Timothy 3:16+17 says,
All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.
What is the cure for deception? It is our confidence in and obedience to what God has revealed about Himself in the Holy Scriptures. In my next letter, I will talk about the importance of reading, studying, understanding, and obeying God’s Word. God has given us all we need to avoid deception and thereby avoid disobedience.
Your Fellow 100th Sheep,
Norman H. Patterson Jr.